Category: Pinterest Ruined My Life, Uncategorized
Honestly, I’m thinking about starting a support group. I mean, whoever created pinterest is 1) a genius and going to be rich and 2) my nemesis. What were they thinking? Don’t they know that my #1 goal in life (aside from being a great mom/wife/employee) is to get in great shape and eat healthy. Well, guess what?! Now I can’t. Actually, I totally could, I just don’t.
Because I’m so god damn busy pinning the quotes that are supposed to inspire me to lose the weight, to eat healthy, to cook up a storm, to bake the most delicious looking things I’ve ever seen and not eat one bite of it, and to turn my house into a pinterest gallery (knowing damn well that I will fail at oh, every single freaking post). Seriously. I go to ‘pinoogle’ something (that’s my new phrase for searching pinterest instead of Google) and one thing leads to the next, I’ve created three boards, renamed another, and found three new crafty critters (that also workout, are perfect wifes/mothers, and betty crockers) to follow.
So, what has pinterest done for me? Well, it’s made me have even less time than I thought was possible. And it’s made me feel like ‘someone busier than me is running right now (oh yes, find that pinned to my fitness inspiration board called ‘thinspiration’ but should be ‘fat-ulous’), and it’s made me poor because I’m out buying lame ass food coloring to make tri-colored bundt cake for the 4th of July (so I can polish off the leftovers while pinning workout tips), I’ve purchased cans of glitter spray can to make god only knows what kinds of crafts I will never make, I’ve saved mason jars and wine bottles to add to the clutter in my ‘jar collection for crafts to attempt’ and it’s made me want to spend free time organizing cabinets that could have already been on display at the Container Store.
Lord help me. Somebody change my password and block my access.
It’s no good. No good, it’s no good. Baby (man, I have lots of baby shower ideas) it’s no good (but that pretzel caramel bark looks GREAT)!
Well, I’ve failed with this blog but all for good reason, which I will explain in the coming months. In meantime, I can finally say… I’m a mom. And it’s the most incredible feeling that I never really understood until they placed him on my chest after delivery. I truthfully had no idea a love like this was possible, but I’m so excited to watch him grow and see which character attributes he takes on… we already know he’s stubborn, so there is no doubt that he’s my baby.
Not only am I spending the first month of Hayden’s life watching him change on a daily basis, but I’m also packing up our entire house and preparing to move next week. This is somewhat entertaining because well, most new moms are supposed to take it easy, sleep when the baby sleeps, not overdue any strenuous exercise, well, tough shit. Sometimes life gets in the way. I will explain our situation at a later date, but for now we had to find somewhere to rent that would accommodate a more closed-off office space so I can continue to work from home even when people are taking care of Hayden in the house. In our current open-concept house, that doesn’t work. AT ALL.
So, in the midst of changing diapers and packing dishes, I actually caught myself saying to my husband… ‘You know, I look pretty good for not showering in two days. Some women look disgusting with no makeup, their hair gets greasy, but not me. I can pull this off.’ Mike came charging into the room where I was packing and said… ‘please stop packing. I will take care of the baby, please take a shower and never brag about how long you can go without showering again.’
Mike was right. Holy crap. What have I become (all new moms are probably thinking… ‘um a mom that puts herself as last priority)? Yes, this is true. But if there is one thing all new moms must remember, we seriously have to take care of ourselves too. Remember, our babies are just really getting a grasp on their vision. Don’t we want to be a pleasant sight for them to see?!
So ladies, if you catch yourself thinking… ‘hmm, I don’t remember putting perfume on this morning’ and a minute later saying.. ‘oh, that’s just the scented version of Desitin permanently stained into my fingers’… um… find a sitter, enlist your husband, let the baby hang out in the crib and HIT THE SHOWERS.
“Are you stupid?” It just flew out of my mouth. Typically I try to be pretty graceful when it comes to the stupid things people say, but today, I just lost it. As if a girl isn’t hard enough on herself as it is, try adding 27 weeks of pregnancy into the mix. Yes, someone actually had the audacity to ask me… ‘are you still gaining weight?’ Not, ‘how are you feeling,’ or ‘hows the little guy doing… growing like a crazy man?” But ‘are you still gaining weight?’ Newsflash to all the idiots out there… call me crazy but I thought it was pretty common knowledge that even celebrities and super models gain weight throughout pregnancy – especially as the baby continues to grow by leaps and bounds each week. When I started reading about the third trimester, I certainly didn’t read about the option to ‘stop gaining weight.’
Even if I had a friend that cruised through the Portillo’s drive-thru for lunch and dinner every day in an honest attempt to gain weight, you’d better believe I’d never come right out and ask about their weight gain. I’m not like that. I was raised right and I’m sensitive to the insecurities that men and women face when it comes to the body they nourish day in and day out – especially pregnant people. In fact, I’m probably known for telling them how absolutely perfect they look every week along the way
So… needless to say… pregnancy is starting to wear on me. I’m reminded quite frequently (like nonstop and all hours of the night) about the true miracle behind all of it… thanks little buddy… but it doesn’t mean I’m not struggling with the weight gain as I’m sure many moms can relate. I’d almost rather go back to the days of people looking straight at my chest or butt, than right to my belly. It’s like they have this measurement tape ready to project out of their head and loop around my stomach.
Why in the world to people feel this renewed sense of freedom when it comes to judging a pregnant woman’s body? It’s a strange phenomenon in a sense… we are all so guarded and so protected in the workplace or anywhere for fear of hurting someone’s feelings – especially when it comes to weight. But the minute someone announces she’s pregnant… it’s a free for all. ‘Go tell Megan EXACTLY what you think about her body! You can’t get in trouble – she’s preggers!?’ Get a grip.
Women will all carry differently. Some women will gain a lot, some will gain a little. Some will feel sexy and beautiful, some will feel like a big fat beached whale. But the bottom line friends… is that I should feel how I’m going to feel… not how your hurtful comments are beginning to make me feel. And the worst part, I’m still near the lower range for weight gain… so imagine if I wasn’t meticulous about working out/eating healthy. I’d probably be pregnant and in jail for punching people.
My favorite piece of advice from Nicole Williams has always been to dress for the job you want (Wildly Sophisticated has been my bible for the past eight years, and I have the signed copy to prove it)… even if it means you need to charge a few things once in a while (hey, Suze Orman even approved this in ‘Young, Broke and Fabulous’). I’ve followed that advice since I first accepted an office job at VISIT Milwaukee and wanted to look the part. Like any college senior who was lucky to have $17 in my account at a given time (plenty for Thursday pizza and pitchers at the Lodge)… I had to open a credit card at the time to help ease the financial discomfort when I realized I had an intern budget and Ann Taylor taste.
So… for the past eight years, I’ve always been proud of my work attire… knowing that it’s conservative with a hint of trend… but mostly timeless. I vowed to never leave the house in something I wouldn’t be proud of if I ran into clients or the hiring manager at my dream job. And then… well, then I got pregnant. How did I turn from Banana Republic to Athleta in a few months time? Nothing against Athleta, I happen to love their clothes… but for the lake/on the weekends/running errands (and trying to pretend I came straight from the gym). Not in the office.
I’ve gained 12 lbs so far this pregnancy… if I continue to gain 1lb each week until I deliver… I’m looking at a total of 27 lbs which I’d be totally happy with… so it’s not like I’ve turned into a hippo and can’t fit in clothes! It’s that there aren’t a lot of clothes to choose from! Well, actually, there are a lot of fantastic clothes to choose from if you have Victoria Beckham or Jessica Alba’s budget … but I don’t. I was so desperate and disappointed with the choices that I actually decided to bring the entire Gap line to my house… (after I gave up on Ann Taylor loft with four unsuccessful shipments returned). Hell, if they don’t have a lot of maternity stores, you’d better believe I would bring it straight to my house. I ordered about 36 things, tried on everything, and ended up liking 8 pieces. That’s it. And I liked them for a very brief time… the ‘try on moment’ when I put something on, look in the mirror, take it off and throw it into the ‘approved’ pile.
With enough to complete three outfits for my DC trip, I packed my bag and headed to the airport… by the time I reached gate C22, my pants were practically falling off me. How did this happen? I went from wearing ‘dressy black pants’ to ‘pajama black pants’ in 30 minutes. Honestly… I spent the entire week trying to ensure my stupid new pants wouldn’t fall down instead of focusing on the conversations I was having, meetings I was involved in and work I was producing. I probably looked frumpy and definitely didn’t feel like the confident professional I always have… it was the first time (in my lifetime) that I actually wished my pants were tighter.
So, professional and pregnant ladies – dress for the job you want. Until you get pregnant. Then, spend like a celebrity or suck it up and be prepared for the fact that your wardrobe might slip a little. Yes, I should probably start going down a size or two in maternity clothes, but then I deal with length issues, or ‘will this fit for just today’ issues… so for now, I think my best bet is to complain about it and plan for some genius new maternity line strictly for the working woman. I mean, aside from a few special cases, when it comes to baby #1, most women are definitely working in some capacity. It’s beyond me that there is such a tiny amount of ‘working’ maternity wear on the market. Good luck and keep me posted on any ‘must haves.’
I will never forget growing up in a family with four girls. I loved my three sisters more than anything, but I always felt a little desire to be ‘different’ than the others (well, Caitlin and I had our major similarities and still do with life/career/family). My sisters always wanted to be moms; definitely a part of their life plans. In ways I wasn’t even able to comprehend, I remember looking at moms driving past in minivans and saying – please don’t ever let that happen to me. Mind you, this was junior year of high school when I was running for VP of Student Government and bought a week worth of perfect outfits/shoes/accessories (we wore uniforms; this was my week to show the real me in normal clothes – and let me tell you, I looked the part and probably spent $1,000). I barely slept since I was working my butt off at the gym and around the clock to have that perfect image. I thought, hell, I could do this. I want my life to be like this… and I think I will always care more about my career than about the desire to have a family or be at home with my kids.
Fast forward to college and you’ll find that I switched majors about 10 times and ultimately went most of the way through college in education to decide – you know, I’m not so in love with kids. And then I entered the PR/marketing track and at last, that is where I was supposed to be. I was meant to shop at Ann Taylor and Banana, wear heels everyday, and most importantly compete with the men to climb my way (and step on them) until I surpassed them on the ladder. I was the girl that never wanted to get married until I was at least 30 and not really settle down until probably 35. I was totally certain. And then I met my husband when I was a senior at Marquette and well, we’ve been together ever since that day.
As women, we go through too many stages in life to count… and too many ‘I know this is the path I want my career to look like’ moments and countless ‘I do want kids, I don’t want kids’ scenarios in our heads. But all of the sudden, one-day you may start to want it all. And from what I’ve read, we can have it all. We can’t be fantastic at each task day in and day out, but we can be pretty damn good when it counts and matters most. And I will never forget when that ‘I want kids’ moment struck me.
I was at Target and saw a mom talking (in a way I’ve sworn I will never talk to my kids), and discussing Halloween costume choices with her toddler, soothing her newborn in his carseat, and clearly had come straight from work/daycare pickup. She had what I wanted. It was the first time I wasn’t annoyed at babies crying everywhere (especially on planes), the first time I stared at moms (and probably creeped them out), and I knew… I was ready. Well, I was ready except for the mini van part. That won’t ever happen. Just a personal preference. We’ve secured that for sure by purchasing two new SUV’s that will last us for a long time.
But regardless of whether or not you have an ‘I’m ready moment.’ Don’t tell yourself it will never happen. You’ll just might surprise yourself.
Is not over. And I’m really tired of friends and strangers’ acting like my life is going to change for the worse. Or ‘for the different’ which if I hear again is going to make me punch someone in the face. Yes, my life will not be the same. But when it comes to my career and spending time with friends, my life isn’t over. In fact, to all the people that act like having children is such a drag, I’d encourage them to take a look around them at all the people/role models/career people they’ve considered ‘a success’ and tell me how many of those people do not have children. It’s something many successful women do, and if nothing else, I think it will brighten my life and encourage further creativity in ways I didn’t think were possible.
So to everyone out there contemplating whether or not they ‘will die as an individual’ as soon as they welcome a little one, trust me, we’ve got enough success stories out there to prove the exact opposite. And in 20-30 years, what success means to all of us will be incredibly different, but I would imagine ‘success’ will mean to be enriched tremendously through life experiences.
Category: General, Uncategorized
Another mom (notice I didn’t say ‘mommy’) blog. Awesome. Just what no one wants to read. Well, sorry for all of you pressured into reading my blog (mom), but it’s always been my intention to blog about issues and challenges that other people (not just women) are facing as they grow professionally and personally on their quest to happiness. I’ve always known that part of my journey would involve children, and we are fortunate enough to make that a reality in 2011.
As a marketing professional, I know how important it is to brand yourself, come up with a name that will last for a while, and ensure the meaning behind it makes sense. Therefore, welcome to MillennialMom. I’ve always found generational research (or maybe just the statistics) to be fascinating whether or not they mean anything… and I definitely fit the demographic of what it means to be a Millennial… and come December, what it means to be a mom.
In this blog, I will share the trials and tribulations (usually with an incredibly sarcastic tone) of working full-time while I prepare to balance mom/work/wife/self full-time in the years ahead. I encourage comments, criticism, and support as you see fit… knowing that my blog is meant to be lighthearted with an occasional serious undertone… but never meant to offend. Don’t get too excited, but I plan to post at least twice a week… s0 look for more hilarity to ensue.
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